Finding a Therapist and Starting Meds
When we last left the story (if you haven’t already read Part One of Our Journey with ADHD, it can be found here), we were sitting our pediatricians office with our G, asking for help.
Because we had been keeping him in the loop as we tried various things, and because we had always been up front and candid with him about how she was doing, this visit wasn’t surprising. I think deep down, Mark and I (and probably Dr. Moore too) knew that this was coming. We knew our children would have genetics that predisposed them to ADHD, anxiety, and depression, which is one of the reasons we were on the lookout in the first place. And G had all the hallmarks. But it was earlier than we had anticipated.
At the appointment we decided to try a two-pronged approach: therapy and medication. We would start the therapy sessions first, to make sure that we were all on the best possible footing, and then add the medication after about a month. Dr. Moore had been in discussion with child psychiatrists at U of M about what would appropriate for a four year old with a clear ADHD diagnosis and had a plan in mind for a very low dose med.
Thanks to some local mom crowdsourcing on Facebook, I found an exceptional therapist who was able to come to our house for appointments. G loves her, and together they tackle dealing with emotions, controlling impulses, expressing hard things with words. It’s all done through play and conversation, and is very, very, very effective. When we started, G saw her therapist weekly. After a few months, when the meds had come on board and the better behavior was sticking, we moved to bi-weekly, and now at about a year out, we have one appointment a month, more if she needs it.
I love having an expert in our corner, someone that I can share what G is struggling with right now, who can help her work through it, and can help me know how to support her best. She gave us the idea to start a sensory diet with G (which has been hugely helpful!) and has given us countless other tips, tricks, and vocabulary to navigate parenting a gifted child with ADHD and anxiety.
We’ve seen huge improvements in G’s ability to transition peacefully, express herself with words, control her impulses, and calm her mind and body thanks to therapy. I don’t know what we would do without it. It has been life changing for all of us.
We saw even more improvements after we started G on a low dose medication. Suddenly our daughter who couldn’t stop moving, who never in three years wound down, was peaceful. And not numb, or zombie like, just peaceful- at rest and at home in her own body. She was happy. She felt good and told us so. She blossomed. All of the remarkable characteristics that were inside of her finally had the chance to come out. She can concentrate on tasks and transition from them. She can take a beat and a breath and assess an idea before putting it into motion. She is thriving.
I know that there can be a stigma attached to both medication and therapy. We’ve come across it ourselves during this journey. Not everyone has been receptive or supportive of the idea that G is in therapy and on meds. But more people than I thought would be are. And because we’ve been pretty open with people in our lives about it, we’ve found support and encouragement in unlikely places. So if you have a child who is exceptional in some way, or you think that your family might benefit from a little expert help, I would encourage you to reach out and ask. It can be hard to ask for help as a parent, but it can also be oh so rewarding when you do.
Some other resources that have helped me as we navigate ADHD and anxiety:
Ginny Kochis is a wealth of knowledge, and her blog Not So Formulaic will make you feel like you’re not in this alone.
CHADD is a great national resource for ADHD